I Just Can't Wait...

You know that song from The Lion King "I Just Can't Wait To Be King"? Great song. I've had that song stuck in my head for the past few days. It plays in my mind over and over. Not a bad song to get in your head if you ask me. No vulgar language, no subliminal messages (that I know of), no inappropriate lyrics.

The other day I was singing this song and I wondered to myself, "What is it that I can't wait for?" Faster than I knew I could think I thought, "I can't wait to be a wife and a mother." 

Two of the most important goals I have set in my life are 1) to become a wife to an amazing man who I love more than anything and who loves me, and 2) to become a mother to the most darling children on earth.

As I do my best to prepare myself for these to goals I become anxious, nervous, excited, terrified, happy, at peace, giddy, and sometimes even a little emotional. These roles: a wife and a mother, are the most precious roles a woman could ever have. I want that. 

These roles do not come easily, nor do they come without responsibility. Being a wife and a mother will probably be two of the most difficult things I will ever do in my life. But they will by far be the most rewarding. 

If you're wondering why I'm so excited, check out The Family: A Proclamation to the World. 

Now as I sing that old Lion King song I unconsciously tweak the words to fit myself a little better. Lately I've caught myself singing "I JUST CANT WAIT TO BE A MOM"! 

ECHO! (echo)

I'm such a copy cat.

Maybe I'm not creative enough to come up with my own life? When I begin spending a lot of time with a person, I pick up on their weird little traits and start doing them myself. It's pretty annoying actually--for them mostly. They probably wonder why this awkward girl wants to be like them? Really it just happens on accident. I can't stop it. 

It's like I'm an obnoxious echo that won't go away.

The Beginning of the End

The end of my summer is quickly approaching. Four more days to be exact. Then school starts. Bleh. 

I've been trying to get myself ready for school to start back up (mentally, academically, physically, spiritually, socially--and any other "ally" words). But it hasn't been working. No, I just end up feeling more unprepared, more nervous, more tired, more bothered, more stressed. I don't love school. 

Don't get me wrong, I love learning, I love my major, I love "college". But I do not love school. I do not love writing papers, taking tests, doing assignments, studying late. All of that stresses me out. Not my "cup of tea" you might say. 

However, it is inevitable. School is right around the corner and it's coming--whether I like it or not. I keep reminding myself that I'm almost done. And I'm not even lying to myself. I really am almost done. Two more semesters (and quite possibly one more Spring term), and I'll be ready to enter the classroom to teach my own students.

I really can't believe it. I'm not old enough to graduate from college. I'm not smart enough. Not ready. But I am so ready. I can't wait to get out there, to make a difference, to do what I've been preparing to do for these last few years. 

This is the beginning of the end for me.

Sparse

Sorry my posts have been (and will continue to be) few and far between lately. I've been having too much fun, being too busy, doing too many things, living life bigger, better, and more fully to have time to write about it. 

But I will still try.

Simple Words

I wish I could say it like he does. He can paint a picture with words. He can create great meaning out of small expressions. He can make simplicity profound. He can take my breath away with a poem or a song.

He can sing too. He sings like an angel.

Zoo Slash Cabin

Last weekend was full of sheep, cows, deer, moose, snakes, rabbits, humming birds, chipmunks, squirrels, fish, and bugs of all shapes and sizes. You may begin to think I went to the zoo. No, no. I did not do that.

Last weekend I took a few friends up to my family’s cabin. Oh how adventurous I felt. The trip started off by getting only a tad lost—I’d never driven there by myself, ok?

We played on the four-wheelers, made yummy meals, built a fire, roasted mallows, played some games, rode the four-wheelers some more, played in the river, went star gazing, and just had a grand ole time. 

The animals were rampant this year. Everywhere we turned we saw another family of deer, another baby moose, another bug we've never seen (and hope to never see again), another exotic bird. I was reminded again just how amazing nature is. The beauty never ceases to amaze me. 

We are so lucky to live in such a gorgeous, exciting world.

Motor Mouth

I have a motor mouth. And sometimes it won’t shut up. I realized that sometimes my lips get moving faster than my brain does. Not only do I end up saying ridiculous things, but I stumble over words, I stutter, and I make myself sound like a complete fool.

I heard myself on an answering machine a few days ago. I couldn’t believe how fast I was talking.

I wish I could just slow it down a bit.

Ouch to the Third Degree

The large purplish/brownish oblong shape located on my right forearm may lead you to believe that I have a nasty growth and/or a huge mole. But don’t be fooled. I have neither. Just one big, nasty, sick, wrong, painful burn. A third degree burn to be exact.

While so responsibly and kindly preparing hamburgers and hotdogs for the patrons of my singles ward at our ward pool party, I was so irresponsibly lifted up (clothing still on) and pulled away from the grill to be so rudely thrown into the pool. In the process of my great struggle to not be thrown in, I may or may not have touched the grill for .03 seconds and received a very brilliantly horrible burn to the third degree.

The evening really was quite fun despite my terrible injury. The pool party was a complete success, the food was great, the people were fantastic, the pool was charming.

Now I’ll have a great scar to remember it by. Cool.

A Dream-like Reality

Have you ever had those nights when you’re half conscious-half dreaming so you can’t really tell what’s real and what’s not? I have those all the time. It’s like sometimes I’m sure I’m dreaming, and other times I feel like maybe this is real.

The other night I had that. So, to start off you have to know that I absolutely hate the sound of alarm clocks. It just makes me cringe. (It is good though—because it makes me jump out of bed real quick when my alarm goes off.) But in this dream I was on a game show where I had to sit there while an alarm clock went off for five minutes. If I could let the alarm ring without turning it off for the whole five minutes, I would win.

I remember as the alarm was going off it felt like torture. I wanted to turn it off so bad—but I couldn’t! I had to win. As I was squirming in my seat trying to resist the urge to turn off the horrible sound I came to and realized my real alarm had been going off for two whole minutes. It wasn’t a game show at all. I wasn’t going to win anything. So I jumped out of bed and turned that dreadful thing off.

I was kinda bummed that I had sat through those horrible two minutes just to find out that it wasn’t real. I wanted to conquer my fears and withstand the temptation to cut the cord of that alarm. I wanted to be a winner.

Instead I just kinda felt like a loser.

White Knuckled Driver

I’m a pretty intense driver. Not intense with road rage or anything. More like intense with complete fear.

I really dislike driving. Especially driving on the freeway. My body gets really tense, I can’t think about anything but driving, can’t even glance at a billboard on the side of the freeway. Nope, I’m glued to the road. My knuckles even begin turning white because I’m gripping the steering wheel so tight.

After driving on the freeway for about ten minutes, I have to remind myself to relax. Loosen my grip on the wheel. Let myself lean back on the seat. Relax my shoulders. Blink.

I especially dislike driving in three particular situations: driving on the freeway, driving in the pouring rain, and driving at night. All three of which I had to do last night.

I was most definitely a white knuckled driver.

Taco Tuesday

 Each Tuesday some people from my ward (and whoever else would like to join) get together for “Taco Tuesday”. It’s practically tradition. We all meet at Rubio’s Mexican Grill to eat some yummy (well, not my favorite—but they’ll do) tacos. It’s more about the company for me than the actual food. Don’t get me wrong, I love food. But I love people more.

Today is Tuesday. That means tonight is “Taco Tuesday”. And supposedly a boy who cannot be named will be making an appearance.

I’m so there.

I've Got It Good

Life is good to me. It really is.

I may complain a lot and think I got the short end of the stick in many areas of my life (and probably did), but really…I’ve got it good.

I’ve got a great family, a nice home, food to eat, a good job, fun friends. What more could a girl want? Well, besides a studly man to hold hands with?  Other than that, I have no reason to complain.

I’m lucky.

The Bachelor{ette}

I usually don’t get sucked into TV shows. But I did get sucked into this one. Big time.

The Bachelorette. Best show ever.

I’m falling in love with some of these men right along with Ali. (Ok, not really. But they’re totally cute.) Last night was the season finale. And I missed it. I’m dying to watch it when I get home from work today. Seriously, dying.

There are two guys left, and I love both of them. I can’t figure out who she’ll choose. I’m hoping for Chris. He’s darling.

I know this is so shallow and definitely not the way to find love, but it’s so addicting.

Can’t wait to see which cutie she chooses! (Except I have a hunch about how the show ends and I’m not too happy about it.)

Tick-Tock

Aren’t minutes still 60 seconds no matter how tired or ready to leave work you are?

How come the clock moves a hundred times slower when you are watching it?